Christmas Gets A Little Retro This Year

Barbies, a microwave that cooks things with a lightbulb, scooters, and the rip-roarin' headache of a game, Hungry Hippo were some of the fun gifts that the girls scored with this year. As I was flipping through the photos, I realized these were all toys I'd had when I was a kid. Hmm, am I trying to relive my childhood or what? This concept surprises me since mom always said I was an old soul. When the other little kids wanted to play tag type games on the playground, I would always say, "No... let's sit under a tree and talk." But I guess despite, my "old soul" tendencies, I do have a nostalgic hankering for the little things that can bring a kid great joy (for at least 9 to 11 minutes).

Anyway, it was a Merry Christmas this year, and I'd love to tell you all about it, but the truth is, as I type this silly little blog entry, a stack of short stories written by well-meaning 15 year olds awaits me. And instead of putting them off yet one more day, I should probably tackle them NOW. Who knows, maybe the next great author of our future is among them, and if not the next great author, perhaps at least I'll encounter a future housewife that blogs a little on the side.

Snow: It Does Exist

Having been raised in the dry heat of the San Joaquin Valley, my ideal climate is tanning bed warm. I like to be warm, I like to be dry, and I like to be tan. Is that so wrong? The point is I have almost NO experience with snow, because rumor had it, snow is wet and cold, which always made me wonder why people deliberately choose to go to it. Then I had kids and in my imagination, I daydreamed about them frolicking in the pure white snow, laughing, and playing. I asked Dan if on Christmas Eve we could drive to Grant's Grove just 2 short hours from Visalia, and introduce the girls to the snow so that I could make my daydream a reality.

Well, I'll say this, it was indeed very beautiful. We even visited the Big General Sherman tree that I believe is the tallest Redwood in the world (275 ft). It was majestic and an impressive testament of God's creation. The girls were very excited, and that made me happy, but as it turns out.... genetics are a mighty thing. Apparently, that whole liking to be warm & dry thing was passed on from me to them, because as soon as we got there, Morgan got snow in her boots and I have never heard that girl cry and fuss and whine so much in her entire 3 years. The older girls got to do a little sledding, and as they finished up, Lorelei went into hysterics about her freezing cold feet. She thought she had frostbite.

Dan accused us all of being a bunch of babies, and looked at me accusingly as if perhaps I was to blame for all of the crying. Then we left.

Needless to say, it was a little bit of Christmas magic, Leaman girls style.

It Wouldn't Be December Without...

The annual Christmas show at school. Plus side: the girls were

cute & loved singing their songs! Down side: We were there for an

eternity, because we had to sit through the preschool performances

& then the elementary school performance.....I have no patience.


The office party. Dan's office mates and our dear friends all

get together and our kids exchange gifts. Plus side: We get to

hang out and eat a lot. Down side: Our friends gave Noelle a

slide whistle, need I say more?

The annual Christmas parade in Camarillo. Plus side, it was

a beautiful, sunny California day that day. Down side: It was

too long (there goes that impatience of mine again), and a guy

yelled at us for sitting where he had staked out his cones hours

before the parade. There's some Christmas spirit for ya!

Frosting Cookies at my house with a few of the girls

friends from church. Plus side: My sainted sister made the

gigantic batch of sugar cookies for us. Down side: Remember,

in addition to the fact that I have no patience, I also have no

self-control, so I ended the day with a sugar over-dose headache

and a vague conviction that I may be getting too old for eating frosting

till I'm sick.

Merry Christmas to Me

Well, I've got to tell you this morning has provided me with a unique glimpse into what it would be like to be a real housewife of Orange County (or wherever... and no I don't actually watch any of those shows because let's face it, I can't afford to lose any more brain cells into the vortex of mindless television). Anyway, I'm officially off of work until January, but all of the girls had to go to school for one last day before vacation, so I find myself here.... at my house...... ALONE!!!

I thought about buying a box of bon bons and eating them in front of the television for a while, but then I remembered the hundreds of cookies I brought home from the Christmas cookie exchange I went to last night, and I figured.... they'd do. So yep, here I am, a mom alone in her house, drinking coffee, eating Christmas cookies, with no small children to ask me how many more days there are until Christmas, with no one yelling, "I'm telling on you," and there are no cups of sticky milk being spilled on my dining room table right now. Instead, it's just me, relaxing, contemplating painting my nails for the first time since August, and wasting time on my computer.

Insert contented sigh.

I guess Christmas came early for me this year.

A Lesson From Scrooge

I have 4 neighbor girls in my neighborhood that live but a stone's throw away from me. I know, I know I'm very lucky to have friends that live so close by. But here's the deal, they're all younger than me, they all have fewer kids than me, and for whatever reason, they're all much perkier, cheerier, happier, more fun-loving type of folk than I happen to be. They all like to make crafty-craft things, or do other people's hair, or of all things run around the block together. I try to avoid all of these types of activities, because I like sit and sulk in my house about how many kids I have, and make fun of them for being hopelessly optimistic about life and love and cuteness for cuteness-sake.

So it should have come as no surprise to me that they had some type of festive fun for the holidays for me to begrudgingly be a part of. Sure enough, they suggested we do Secret Santas this year. You know, we pick names and anonymously drop off gifts on each others' porches and mailboxes, etc. I attempted to refuse, and complained loudly that I have SOOOOO much going on right now, and this will be just one more thing on my "to-do" list, and they made me do it anyway.

I was determined to be a scrooge about it, until this morning when I opened my front door and saw the coca-cola in a bottle pictured above, and guess what........

It made me SO HAPPY!

One little bottle of soda is really all it takes to thoroughly make my day. So thank you Secret Santa, whoever you are, and thank you to all my perky, happy little neighbor girls that love rain drops and Santa Clause and twinkle lights..... thank goodness there are freaks like you guys in the world, because if everyone was a Scrooge like me, there'd be no Disneyland, no ridiculous movies starring Reese Witherspoon, and there'd certainly be no such thing as Secret Santas.

Ode to Our Photographer

When it comes to taking pictures, I'm totally lame.

My kids faces turn out blurry, & unfocused, it's really such a shame.

Thank goodness I have neighbors who have an artist's eye.

When they take our family photos, I almost want to cry!

They have a way of making us look better than we actually look in real life.

They have the patience to put up with our whining while we pose and give them strife.

With Christmas cards coming soon, I suggest you give them a call.

They're bound to make you look good, way better than the mall!

http://herveyphoto.com/

& yep, they took the photo I used as the heading for the blog, I got so many comments on

that photo, I wanted to give the Herveys a shout out! Seriously, they're great, check them

out!

Hot Cocoa.... No Thanks

This is why children shouldn't have hot chocolate..... ever!

The Family Photo Christmas Card Endeavor

It's that time of year again folks, the time when I attempt to get my kids, my husband, and I to all face the same direction and smile like we like each other. Yep, every November we attempt to take the perfect picture for our yearly Christmas card. We made it almost through an entire hour photo shoot before the crying began. As the girls ran from one picturesque scene to another, there was some tripping and falling over each other that resulted in skinned knees and a sudden lack of enthusiasm for posing for our photographers.

So, I want to order cards that are reasonably priced, and that provide a classic format for our family pic. This year, I'm going with shutterfly (and yes this is a shameless plug). They've got pages of formats for me to choose from, and I can't wait to see my finalized product. Maybe you should get shopping too! http://www.shutterfly.com/cards-stationery/christmas-photo-cards

Shopping Made Easy

You may be wondering what are these ladies (myself included) doing exactly? Well, I'll tell you. I happen to have an incredibly crafty and talented neighbor that lives one house away from me who makes amazing and delightful decorations and personalized necklaces and jewelry. Tuesday night we laid out a spread of all her wares at my home, and about 20 ladies from near and from far came to browse and shop for Christmas gifts and so on. Can I just tell you that as much as I have always loved shopping, shopping in your own kitchen while eating cookies, drinking cider, and talking with your friends brings it to a whole new level!

Needless to say, we had a lot of fun, and if you're curious about my friend's products, you're in luck, she has a website. So go check it out and get some of your early Christmas shopping done! www.bethanymariedesigns.com/

Bragging is So Unbecoming

Okay, so I know that I'm trying to teach my kids that bragging isn't right, but I'm going to have to break my own "No bragging" rule for a moment. I figure it's slightly okay, because I'm not going to brag about my kids, my husband, or myself..... Nope, today I'm bragging about my sister!

Yesterday our little Bethie ran her first half marathon which is 13.1 miles, which is about 13 more miles than I could ever run. 1,487 people ran the half-marathon, and my sister came in 18th of the women!!! In her first half-marathon, with a time of an hour and 37 minutes!!! I think that's especially impressive, since she's only 4 foot 11, and her entire body was the length of some of her competitor's legs - I'm just saying.

To celebrate, I'm going to go have some pumpkin pie I made for breakfast. Let's see it's 6:58 am right now, I'm getting ready to eat a pie breakfast, and Bethie's at a gym somewhere. I'm beginning to wonder if one of us was switched at the hospital.

Anyway, have a good day all.... and remember my sister is cooler than yours if you have one.

California - Only Good For Our Weather

Okay, so seriously, on a positive note, I'm going to wear a sundress and sandals today and it's November 3rd. But let's face the reality of some of my state's newly elected officials: Embarrassing. Liberal. Embarrassing and liberal.

So perhaps it was no coincidence that I read this verse last night:

Daniel 2:20-21

Blessed be the name of God forever and ever, to whom belong wisdom and might. He changes times and seasons; he removes kings and sets up kings; he gives wisdom to the wise and knowledge to those who have understanding.

So with that I will not face my future in a fearful or anxious way. God appointed Pharoah and hardened his heart against Moses at one point in history, and He did that for a reason. So today, I will not be disheartened by my new leaders, rather I will trust in the God who removes kings and sets up kings..... and I will be grateful for the warm weather He has provided!

Let the Candy-Eating Begin!

That's right... embrace the cuteness. Thank you mom for making Beth that adorable Heidi-esque dress for Bethie (my sister) back in the 80s, and thank you for actually keeping it, so that we could put Morgan in it and re-enact The Sound of Music. And yes, this year you truly outdid yourself by making Lorelei's doll a matching costume. I so enjoyed pushing the stroller around the block as we went trick or treating, you know the stroller for the doll! I didn't want to push and force you to make the twins costumes too, so for that we must thank Target. Kitty cat ears seemed genius to me because I thought, wow, cheap and simple, and then when the bunny ears concept fell through for Noelle at the last minute, we bought the least plastic looking costume we could find for Noelle. It was labeled Snow Princess and she was loving it, so we all lived happily ever after.

Well, sort of. I actually have a stomach ache right now, because even though I enforced the only 2 candies today rule for the kids, I found myself repeatedly sneaking into the kitchen for just one more itty bitty Twix. They seemed so small, so bite size, but apparently when you eat bite size candies ALL DAY, they end up sort of stomach size. And I wonder why my kids lack self-control.

Sports? Really?

Those of you that know me well, know that when it comes to sports, I am neither a fan, nor a participant of ANY type of athletics.... and I mean ANY type. I'm so uncoordinated, I can barely swim, I've never returned a ball in ping pong, never ran a complete mile, and I've never served a volleyball successfully over any net. So how is it that my Saturdays now include soccer games, gymnastics, and a new church softball league? I'm not sure how it's happened, perhaps I'm over compensating for my total lack of physical activity by forcing my kids into sports, regardless, somehow I've turned into yet another mini-van driving soccer mom. The twins are in AYSO this season, and they've got the awesomest (yeah that's right, I said awesomest) coach ever, so awesome, I'd have his children..... oh wait, I already did. Coach Dan is practically at saint-level status as he attempts to motivate 6 little 4/5 year old girls to stop hugging each other, and start kicking the ball..... preferably in the right direction.

So here's what I like about AYSO so far.... it's cheap. That's right I said, cheap. When you have twins, everything doubles in cost, and that's not very fun. My oldest child decided she LOVES gymnastics. Initially, I thought that was cute, now I realize this stinks because gymnastics is super expensive. Upon further investigation of possible tennis, golf, ballet, tap, dance lessons, I soon realized why AYSO is so popular, because it's comparatively inexpensive. Of course they make you pay in other ways, with your time, your snacks, your dignity as you lug lawn chairs, toddlers, water bottles, and granola bars across a field and try to convince your other children this is fun. But I digress, the truth is, it's not that bad, and one of my twins definitely has gotten the idea of the whole game, the other twin (who shall remain nameless - rhymes with Palin) just likes to run back and forth and smile out at the fans as if she's competing for Miss California. Wherever did she come from?

Twins? Are You Sure?

I'm really amazed that my twins, Maylin & Noelle actually shared the same womb at one time, because they couldn't be more different. People ask me if they're super close, if they have their own special language, or unique bond.... The answer is um, no. They painted these pictures in class last week. You know what they say, "A picture is worth a 1ooo words." Maylin loves purple and she constantly draws pictures of little girls. Noelle, well... I'm not sure what color she likes this week... and though she claims that's a portrait of a "machine," I'm not totally convinced.

A Woman With Priorities

To Do List:

1. Beg mom to sew costumes for kids for upcoming Halloween.

2. Catch up on the multiple shows I've been recording via my DVR.

3. Figure out where I can get store bought goods that look baked for bible study tomorrow.

4. Teach my kids how to grade high school essays. (Just mark with red every 4 or 5 lines, you may get lucky).

5. Find time to go grocery shopping since the pantry currently only holds refried beans and

some expired chicken broth.

6. Consider that the holidays are steadily approaching, and take a few minutes to feel overwhelmed.

7. Seriously, catch up on those TV shows, this is Oprah's last season.

8. Take pictures so that the next time you blog, you have evidence you have children.

9. Bring the grass back to life again, so that the neighbors don't resent us.

10. And lastly, come up with something to blog about that's more interesting than your life, which currently consists of driving kids places, grading papers, heating up frozen pizza, and not watching enough television.

The Latest

In case you feel like you live really far away, and you don't get to know the kids as well as you'd like to, let me give you the latest on the four girls.

First of all we have our oldest, our little first grader. Lorelei recently asked, "Do you have to practice drawing a lot to be the President?"

Ummm, what do you mean exactly?

Because they have to be really good artists, right?

Ummm, not necessarily, why would they need to be good artists?

You know, so they can draw all the dollars for us.

So apparently those are her thoughts on Obama.... I'm guessing they haven't really covered U.S. History yet this year.

Then there's Noelle. Her favorite thing to do these days is complain about the temperature in the van and see how long it takes before mom gives in and adjusts the air for her. I'd like to tell you this is a charming habit, I really would.

As for Maylin, she likes to insist we play the same CD in the car at all times, preferably at full volume. I don't know much about birth order, but I'm wondering if middle children are more demanding than the others.

Then there's Morgan, she had her first "share" day today in preschool. She had to share something red. She took Elmo. I'm guessing it went well, but I guess I'll never really know, since I wasn't there and all. I've also started to notice that she talks to herself frequently throughout the day. Today as she was spreading some processed cheese onto a cracker while Lorelei took her gymnastics class, she was saying quietly, "spread, spread, spread, spread...."

Then there's Dan & I. We went to a bible study tonight that's showing a DVD series on parenting by Tedd Tripp. We figured since the kids are talking to themselves, making constant demands in the car, and our oldest daughter thinks that drawing is the most important skill a politician should possess, maybe we ought to re-evaluate how things are going.

We'll keep you posted.

Shout Out

Our friends from church started an awesome company that sells hair products, including colorful gel that the kids can put into their hair and then wash out that same day. Check out zachswax.com to learn more, and wait.... who are those cute models they put on their home page? Could it be two of my very own daughters? Okay, so I'm biased, and I'm going to support their products forever now. Check it out!

School! School! School!

Lorelei's 1st day in Mrs. Bowen's class
The twins line up for their teacher Mrs. Lewis
And Morgan gets cuddly with Mrs. Paladino on her 1st day!

So it's here at last... September: the mad rush for back to school supplies, the blaring alarm clocks, the stocking up of snack foods for lunch boxes, and lots and lots of VAN time as I maneuver my way across town for drop offs and pick ups and later pick ups.

With it all brings mixed emotions. I am somewhat of a creature of habit, so I welcome the idea of a predictable routine, but I'm surprised at how tiring it to get back in to. I'm amazed that Lorelei is in "big kid" 1st grade now, and has homework, and is acting like she's soooo old now. She said the other day, "I saw the kindergartners pass by mom, and they were sooo cute," as if she's so much older than them.

Meanwhile, I'm thrilled for my younger three as they are still in preschool basically, pre-k for the twins and a younger class of 3 year olds for Morgan. Their teachers are so nurturing and "huggy," I'm amazed at their willingness to love on and embrace all these little guys. I mean it's one thing to think your own kiddos are cute, but these ladies actually like all these kids. They are their own unique breed of people, and they should all get extra jewels on their crown someday!

As for me, I'll stick to teaching junior high and high school. You think three year olds are cute? There's nothing cuter than 4 foot tall 12 year old boys sitting next to 12 year old girls that are 5 foot 7 and look 5 years older than them. I love the awkwardness of adolescents, they're all right on the brink of beautiful, but they've still got a few things they need to figure out, and they're still not too cool to laugh at my jokes. What could be better?

Bye, Bye Summer... You were Good To Me

To celebrate summer's final days, we spent a few days together exploring the aquarium in Long Beach, swimming at a hotel pool (to my kids, this is the equivalent of a winning the lottery), and then we headed to Lake Arrowhead with Sandhya's amazing family (my TMC bff).... ahhh Summer days, so sweet, so necessary.... the rest I needed to prepare me for the working days ahead! We came, we saw, we suntanned....we got a little cranky with our husbands for not taking the freeway exits we suggested, but overall.... we loved every minute of our beautiful state! We couldn't help but marvel at the fact that here we could be enjoying the beach in one city and then within just a few hours drive, enjoying the hills and lakes of the San Bernadino mountains! It was a great send off to summer.... now perhaps, I'd better stop blogging, and start thinking about that new class I'm teaching... you know that one that starts Monday?